How to ascend progressive organizations

As a non-progressive

You’re conservative. Your colleagues are progressive. You need this job. 

In fact, you want to rise to the top, to gain wealth and make a good life for your family, without losing your soul. Here’s how you do it. 

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Why you’re there

The first step is to be absolutely clear on why you took this job. Always remember this: you go to work to earn money, to build a career, and to provide for your family. 

You do not go to work in order to politically convert the random person they sit you next to. 

All subsequent advice should be taken with this in mind. You will be tempted to argue with people, to reply to snarky group messages, to crusade against the constant indoctrination. 

Pause. Breathe. Repeat this mantra: “Is the risk worth the reward?” 

Are you likely to convert any of these 25 year old radicals with a Slack message? No. Are you likely to get reported to HR? Yes. 

This is the reality of the situation. Let this sink in. It’s worth remaining silent to feed your kids. 

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Know your opponent 

Woke activists are a curious breed. As we all know, they can become totally insane, demanding that someone lose their livelihood over expressing the most normal opinions, screaming demands for ‘justice’. 

On the other hand, you’ll find that these same people can - when not triggered - be good natured, skilled at their jobs, even kind and funny. You want to keep them in this mood: your life will be more pleasant, and you’ll have fewer unnecessary enemies. 

If you get good at navigating woke institutions, you can forge real friendships, even with people who claim to hate conservatives. Try to keep love and charity in your heart: remember that these people have been brainwashed, and they might have been quite normal in a sane era (admittedly some would have been spiteful demons in any era). 

Like the Manchurian Candidate, these people have trigger words that will send them from being pleasant into a sudden frenzy. You can imagine what these words are: avoid them. There’s really no reason to discuss immigration, abortion, and how Pat Buchanan has been vindicated - you might win a battle but you’re certain to lose the war. 

Be the Sun Tzu of Goldman Sachs. Fly under the radar. Your HR department should have no idea who you are. 

But this doesn’t mean that you have to be totally passive.